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Crying while eating curry is the perfect way to make neighbors keep their distance.

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You’re damn right I’m gonna complain about the goddamn heat today. 102 and no ac at home = dreadful.

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Do you think guide dogs get depressed?

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I just discovered my very profound tweets were not being sent. It’s better this way.

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How does one suddenly lose the tip of their chapstick?

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I’m pretty sure I have feline AIDS.

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2am is an unreasonable time to get heartburn.

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How is it that cleaning up shit yields even more shit?

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I had a really difficult time counting chess pieces today. Now that I have a total I have no idea if it’s enough to play.

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So this whole summer sickness thing is not cool.

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